A bit of a laugh

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A bit of a laugh

Post  Quinlan Sa'athis on Fri Feb 18, 2011 2:08 pm

Australian Letter of the Year....

This is an actual letter sent to the DFAT (Department of Foreign Affairs and Trade) Immigration Minister. The Commonwealth Government tried desperately to censure the author, but got nowhere because every legal person who read it nearly wet themselves laughing!

Dear Mr. Minister,

I'm in the process of renewing my passport, and still cannot believe this.

How is it that K-Mart has my address and telephone number, and knows that I bought a television set and golf clubs from them back in 1997, and yet the Federal Government is still asking me where I was born and on what date?

For ***** sakes, do you guys do this by hand?

My birth date you have in my Medicare information, and it is on all the income tax forms I've filed for the past 40 years.

It is also on my driver's licence, on the last eight passports I've ever had, on all those stupid customs declaration forms I've had to fill out before being allowed off planes over the past 30 years.

It’s also on all those insufferable census forms that I've filled out every 5 years since 1966.

Also... would somebody please take note, once and for all, that my mother's name is Audrey, my father's name is Jack, and I'd be absolutely f****** astounded if that ever changed between now and when I drop dead!!!...

****! What do you people do with all this information we keep having to provide??

I apologise, Mr. Minister. But I'm really pissed off this morning.

Between you and me, I've had enough of all this bullshit!

You send the application to my house, then you ask me for my f****** address!!

What the hell is going on with your mob? Have you got a gang of mindless Neanderthal ********s working there!

And another thing, look at my damn picture.... Do I look like Bin Laden?

I just want to go to New Zealand and see my new granddaughter.

Well, I have to go now, cause I have to go to the other end of the city, and get another f****** copy of my birth certificate - and to part with another $80 for the privilege of accessing MY OWN INFORMATION!

Would it be so complicated to have all the services in the same spot, to assist in the issuance of a new passport on the same day??

Nooooo.. that'd be too f****** easy and makes far too much sense.

You would much prefer to have us running all over the place like chickens with our f****** heads cut off, and then having to find some high-society '******' to confirm me in a photo..

You know the photo... the one where we're not allowed to smile?! ..... You f****** morons.

Signed - An Irate Australian Citizen.

P.S. Remember what I said above about the picture, and getting me identified....

Well, my family has been in this country since before 1850! In 1856, one of my forefathers took up arms with Peter Lalor. (You do remember the Eureka Stockade!!)

I have also served in both the CMF and regular Army for something over 30 years (I went to Vietnam in 1967), and still have high security clearances. I'm also a personal friend of the president of the RSL... and Lt General Peter Cosgrove sends me a Christmas card each year.

However, your rules require that I have to get someone "important" to verify who I am; you know... someone like my doctor - WHO WAS BORN AND RAISED IN F****** PAKISTAN!!!..... a country where they either assassinate or hang their ex-Prime Ministers - and are suspended from the Commonwealth for not having the "right sort of government".

You are all f****** idiots!
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Quinlan Sa'athis


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Re: A bit of a laugh

Post  Jacan Na'al on Fri Feb 18, 2011 2:12 pm

Lol, I have to admit, sometimes I feel exactly the same way.

I am one of the people that is in full support of ID chips or barcodes on every person and for them to be used for everything from money to identification.
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Re: A bit of a laugh

Post  Kevlar on Sat Feb 19, 2011 12:50 am

lol! I never actually thought about it, but every single one of his points are so true, and none of it makes sense either. Donno why the f' they want you to fill out useless information and just through hoops.

Maybe it's a case of Oscar Wilde

"The bureaucracy is expanding to meet the needs of the expanding bureaucracy."
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Re: A bit of a laugh

Post  Jeme'Maer on Sat Feb 19, 2011 7:32 am

wow, so America isn't the only one with that problem eh?
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Re: A bit of a laugh

Post  Razorrocks on Sun Feb 20, 2011 5:17 am

That is hilarious.
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